The Fart Effect.

27 02 2010

I just farted. And then directly after that for some reason I thought about the split second that the Big Bang happened and the Universe began unravelling and existing in all directions at impossible speeds. Over the next 13.5 billion years countless galaxies and stars formed and died. Planets were created and destroyed. Earth formed, water became and landmasses broke apart and connected in an endless dance of creation. Life formed and evolved; humans arrived, towns were formed, people were killed, cities grew and gloves were invented. Then I, Glen Matthew Huscroft of England, Earth, at that one specific moment, farted. That is one fucking big Rube Goldberg Machine, and my fart was just a simple cog in the great contraption. But, for a brief second, creation itself had lead to that very moment.


The Importance of being Locke

22 05 2009

Good and evil has always been a prominent theme throughout Lost. From the opening episode of the show, the theme has prominently been symbolised using black and white. At the centre of this in the season 5 finale was John Locke, a man who has pure faith in the island. Locke himself represents good, or white: “I looked into the eye of this island… and what I saw was beautiful”, “It looked like a beautiful bright light”. Flocke (Fake-Locke, the seemingly evil man opposing Jacob in the opening scene of the Season 5 finale who is using Johns body) as Locke represents evil , or black. Little did we know from season 1 that Locke would be a character torn between both sides. Not literally John, but his body and image. Obviously the signs were there throughout the latter half of season 5. Upon resurrection we all noticed that Locke was a changed man — he appeared almost arrogant; as if he knew more than he should and more than he was letting on. But the signs that Locke would one day be used as a pawn between good and evil were present way before season 5.

Locke explains a lot more than backgammon

“Two players, two sides. One is light… and one is dark”. Never has this scene been more important. The lines were previously blurred between what or who was white and what or who was black. Widmore? Dharma? The Others? Now we have 2 central figures — Jacob and Flocke — and inbetween them Locke, used as a pawn by Flocke to kill Jacob. The next time black and white becomes prominent in the show is again a scene with Locke.

Locke has a black eye

He appears in Claires dream with one black eye and one white eye in Season 1’s “Raised by Another”. Little did we know that this could indeed nod to a direct and literal split in Locke, the white eye representing the real John and the black eye referencing Flocke. What is perhaps more interesting in this scene is that Locke is dealing out tarot cards which are traditionally used to read a persons future… Listen to the noise made when Locke deals the first Tarot card. A knife being unsheathed. The importance of a knife to John has always been what we thought was a simple urge to hunt. But it seems Flockes plan was somewhat ingrained into Lockes destiny from birth…

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Which of these things belongs to you John?“. The correct answer was, of course, the compass. It literally belonged to Locke, he gave it to Richard merely 2 years prior. But young Locke chooses the knife. Again, possibly a sign of things to come. Lockes ultimate destiny was always set in stone. Whatever happens happens. The knife represents Johns dark side… Flocke. The tool ultimately used to bring Jacobs life to an end. It isn’t literally John of course, but Lockes body is ultimately destined to play out that role.  This early connection with the island and his ultimate destiny is present in this scene again by the presence of the smoke monster in young Lockes wall drawings.

This brings us to the final early prominent black and white imagery…

"Bring me the eyes of John Locke and I will give you your... saviour"

Adam and Eve. The nickname given by Locke to the two bodies found in the caves in season 1. Found in a pouch alongside the two bodies is one black stone and one white stone. In the past, I’ve always theorised that Adam and Eve would be a major couple on the show — Rose and Bernard, Jack and Kate, Desmond and Penny. After the season 5 finale, I think it has to be mythologically bigger than that. One possibility that just sprung to mind is that the bodies are BOTH Locke. Imagine, if you will, that Flocke is killed in season 6 as the form of John Locke. One good Locke and one bad — black and white. These are the two bodies found in season 1 and it gives the stones more relevance than ever. This would bring the entire black and white symbolism and Lockes relevance to it full circle. The main problem with this theory is that the bodies have been decaying for approx 50 years by Jacks estimates. Having said that if any show can have two bodies present in 2007 somehow buried in 1954 it’s Lost. Locke just seems to be heavily involved with the black and white imagery and while it isn’t technically Locke who hands the knife to Ben, the events are certainly foreshadowed throughout Lockes life. Regardless of who the two bodies are, this black and white imagery culminated in the season 5 finale with two distinct parties, Jacob and his opposition. The man responsible for Lockes downfall and the man who ultimately becomes (F)Locke. Black and White.

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13 03 2009

I guess for the majority of my time as a young adult I’ve been an agnostic. I think in the back of my head I’ve always been an Atheist, I’ve just been scared to admit it — not to the public, but to myself. It is true that religion can be a great comfort and there is little I fear more than my inevitable none-existence after death. That may make religious folk feel superior having that comfort and their “knowledge” that they will exist after death, but regardless, I would rather not believe a lie just to make myself feel better. I wouldn’t want to be told that my favourite sports team has won the game if they had in fact lost. I hate most sports, but anyway, the point is that I am more content during my life as an atheist, even if that means letting go of the concept of an afterlife. Regardless, I think that everybody, even Christians, fear death so lol @ dat.

I am way too lazy to type out an entire argument against God because I have nobody to debate with on a blog and I’d be repeating myself having had such debates before both on and offline. It is probably my favourite internet debate not only because the existence of God is probably the biggest question of all time but because it often brings forth some of the best and the worst and certainly the most stupid of people. So In this blog post, I am going to post excerpts of my arguments and debates from various forums because, as I said, I’m too lazy to entirely write them out again. I’ll likely repeat myself here too as I’ve said similar things to numerous people on multiple forums.

If anybody is curious as to why I turned “full Atheist” the answer is simply that due to the advent of the internet, debates like this can exist more openly and I can readily seek out knowledge and answers. The success of people such as Richard Dawkins not only helps to cement my stance but they actively made me think about the subject, and not vaguely dismiss it in my head. A lot of my arguments probably seem Dawkins-like because, well, they make sense. And he is the one that made me logically think and conclude that God very likely doesn’t exist which is, believe it or not, quite a radical change in ones mind from “God might exist”.

The first time I entered a religious thread, it was more tongue-in-cheek if anything. There was no real debate I was just having fun with the question. The question posed by the thread starter was:

If there was a God, what would be the first question you’d ask him after you passed?” to which I replied:

I’d say “Hey God, why are you such a vague bastard? I understand that you need to be believed, which takes faith and not proof, but in this modern world of science a belief in you seems more than ridiculous. That does not make us Atheists evil, but logical, so why deny yourself to be a part of our lives; instead hoping that we will seek you, a guy whom the existence of appears to be literally preposterous. I understand that by your terribly dated and unfair “rules” I am to be sent to my eternal torture for simply having an open mind, so I’d just like to know why you not only hide your existence from us, leaving behind the worlds poorest sign in the form of a book of fairy tales, but also give us no reason to have faith in you — living in a world full of pain and anguish caused largely through religious and natural acts which surely could be prevented by your “good” self (I’d say that last part sarcastically and ironically as an omnipotent God would know of my sarcastic intent)”.

I would then refuse to ask for forgiveness as I have done nothing morally wrong, and instead ask for him to ask me for forgiveness. I’d then explain that I would have asked for forgiveness, but an omnipotent God would see through my plastic begging as a simple way to try and blag my way into Heaven. I’d use ‘please‘ and ‘thank you‘ to show him my well mannered ways, and explain that I actually bought CD’s and DVD’s despite my collection of pirated material. I’d then apologise for wasting his time by talking as he already knows what I’m going to say and then I’d inquire about how many forgiven rapists have repented their way into Heaven while I sit and talk semantics. I’d ask how he could possibly be talking to all of the other people that have just died — there could not possibly be a queue, it would be never ending. At this point I will have re-convinced myself that this whole thing is absolutely ludicrous, full of whimsical pre-science smoke and mirrors and that even as a story or fairy tale, it is a bad one. I’d kick God in the balls and wake up from my dream, or, if I’m in some sort of coma, I’d probably run away giggling. If I’m dead, then this wouldn’t have happened unless it is some sort of reaction in my brain to my death before it finally shuts down (similar to the scientific reasoning for “seeing the light”). At this point I will fade out and re-enter the state I once was before my parents conceived me. It is a presently sad and empty state to think about, being nothing at all, but an unfortunately inevitable one. As comforting as the thought of an after life may seem, comfort does not provide logic or proof, so I’ll unfortunately have to stick with the hard, cold truth. Bugger.

As I said, this didn’t — and wasn’t intended to — spark debate. The replies ranged from “That was beautiful icon_cry.gif” to “WINRAR”.

The second question I came across was a thread asking,

What evidence is there that one [a god] doesnt exist?” to which I replied:

It is totally all on you to prove that he does exist. You are claiming his existence, not me, therefore I have to prove nothing. If I tell you that there is a Unicorn orbiting the planet right now, it is not your job to prove to me that there isn’t one. Logic tells you that there isn’t; it’s a given. It’s my job to prove to you that there really is one. Christianity — which is about as believable as an orbiting Unicorn — must be proven to be true by the people that believe. They’re you’re claims, not mine. So tell me, why does God exist and why is it that you believe in a Christian God and not Zeus, Thor or Allah? Had you been brought up anywhere else in the world, you’d be believing in a different God, so doesn’t that tell you that your God is part of a societal tradition and heritage and not a belief through pure faith?

Another poster followed up with,

After a long discussion with a friend of mine (who was agnostic), he said that since I didn’t say 100% positive that God doesn’t exist, that would therefore make me an agnostic. My cousin, who’s an atheist, agreed with what my friend said. So that was always my standard for the difference between atheism and agnosticism.” to which I replied:

You can never 100% prove that something doesn’t exist. If nobody has ever seen it, all we can say is that it is really likely that something doesn’t exist. Nobody can say that Fairies and Unicorns 100% don’t exist, but that isn’t a basis for believing in them, nor to even think “they might exist” (Are you Unicorn Agnostic?). It is simply easier to assume that they do not, as the likelihood of them existing is so tiny. If you don’t believe in God because you really think it’s very unlikely that there is one then you are an Atheist. If you don’t know if you believe or not because you don’t feel that there is enough evidence either way, you are an agnostic. But like I’ve said, there will never be evidence that will totally disprove the existence of a fairy, but to be fairy agnostic seems silly — “of course they don’t exist. They’re made up in stories“. Well, Atheists feel the same way about religion. An almighty God? Prayer? Miracles? Just as ridiculous as a fairy.

Somebody then asked, “God doesn’t exist? And yet, no one knows what caused the Big Bang!” to which I replied:

God has been used to explain a lot of things throughout history, from Earthquakes to the weather. It makes absolutely no sense to get to a point where we are stumped (what caused the Big Bang?) tothen just say “… it must have been God“. It’s not only lazy to fill sciences gaps with God, it is an insult to the science and theory.

Not to mention that if the Big Bang is so complex that it could only have began with a God, then that God would have to be even more complex than that which he created. What created him? If you just assume God is infinite, then why can’t we assume that the Universe is also infinite? Is there some sort of rule that only Gods can be infinite and capable of creation? Why can’t the Universe be on a constant expanding/collapsing cycle. Which is more rational to assume? Certainly not the existence of an omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent, benevolent deity. And why did it take an all-powerful God 6 days to create the Earth? I’m not impressed.

An actual debater then stepped up, not just somebody who asked a question but didn’t have the capacity to reply to my answers.

Sorry, but i have to bring up a technicality on this burden of proof business that always ticks me off: if somebody is making a definite statement that “God does not exist” they are making a positive claim (which is not agnosticism, btw). They are making a definite statement. As such these people do hold a burden of proof. Therefore, if you maintain that “God does not exist” you have just as much of a burden to prove your statement as a theist does in saying “God does exist”. The only possible negative statement in this case is the statement of “i don’t know”. Anything that falls either side of that is an assertion of a belief and therefore a positive claim.

It really irks me when atheists claim they don’t hold any burden of proof while claiming that god does not exist. It’s completely illogical.” to which I replied:

No. The claim “God does not exist” did not spring out of nowhere. It is a direct reply to the idea that “God does exist”. The claim is based on disproving Christianity. So it is the job of Christianity to prove that God does exist, not our job to prove otherwise. If it wasn’t for religion, the debate wouldn’t exist and there would be no “God does not exist” point of view. It is the opposing view created in response to the claims of your text. Since it is a statement in response to something, it is not our job to prove or disprove the original statement; “A god exists”, it is your job to prove that your statement holds weight.

The logic you are using could be used against anything. Purple Panda’s from the planet Clitoris do not exist. Well of course they  don’t, and the burden is not on me to disprove them. If somebody claimed such a thing existed, it would be entirely up to them to prove that and not up to the rest of the world to prove otherwise.

He replied with:

I never said it was up to the rest of the world to prove theists wrong. All i’ve said is that if hard-lined atheists wish their claims to be taken as absolute fact they need to prove said claims. The fact that the proof of their claims would negate the existence of god is incidental.” to which I replied:

Actually, you’d have trouble finding many Atheists claim that his or her claims are fact, and that God 100% does not exist. If that makes everybody Agnostic, so be it. It, like everything, comes down to likelihood. Like fairies and Unicorns, we cannot prove that God does not exist, but like God the likelihood of them existing is so slim that a belief in them, or even an agnostic stance, seems silly. Why is the existence of God unlikely? Well, there isn’t a shred of evidence supporting the claims of any religion. The ideas, morals and stories in the bible are those of simpler times and are terribly dated. Christianity picks and chooses which parts of the religion they choose to follow. They follow a set of man-made rules and morals, using nicely picked out text from a book to justify it and ignoring anything in the book which makes them uncomfortable.

The idea of a God and his abilities has no foundation or logic in any kind of scientific way. Atheists have for years tried to explain things purely with science. They have made vast steps over the last century or two with the theories of Evolution and the Big Bang which take us one step further to fully understanding a Godless universe and for it to legitimately make sense. We haven’t created baseless ideas, child-like fairy tales and beliefs stemming from nothing but pure faith likely based on your country/family heritage and upbringing. And that’s without even mentioning the fact that there are dozens of God‘s and religions with absolutely no indication nor evidence as to which is a one true God or the correct path. Again, blind faith dependent on which country you are brought up in and your race.

So, while I cannot tell you that God does not exist, nor prove it to you, I can show you using facts and logic how likely it is that he doesn’t and how a belief in a Godless universe is not only possible, but logical and likely.

He then ended the debate by saying that he understood and respected my point but disagreed.

I think this post is long enough as is. That was a selection from one forum and I could easily go on. I haven’t even touched on the people that think we have no morals and that evolution is a lie. Maybe I’ll keep those for a post in the future.

Happy Birthday to me…

17 01 2008

OK, so it was my birthday two days ago but meh. Not much occured, really. I’m not celebrating it til the weekend. Being here at Uni, there’s not much to do aside from have a few drinks with a few friends, which I did. Watched Boogie Nights, which I love. Chest Brockwell… what a name! This weekend I’m going home. Going to get my presents off friends/family and go out on Saturday to celebrate, so I’ll probably update this after then, hopefully with some pictures. Aside from that, we’ve just been playing a bit of Rock Band really. Completed drum campaign on Hard (Suck on that, ‘Run To The Hills’) and I’m a fair bit through expert.

I need a hair cut.

Happy New Year

11 01 2008

OK, so I’m a bit late in updating my blog. But I’ve been home over Christmas and New Year and I’ve never really got round to doing it. I guess I’ll start where I last left off.

I bought an American brand new Elite 360 off eBay. It was perfect. Already in the country, brand new, American and only £200. That’s cheaper than a Premium over here; I guess nobody wanted it because it’s American an it doesn’t come with a UK power cable (I already have one). Better yet, he only lived 20 miles away so we went to pick it up. That gave us a whole night of Rock Band before we broke up for the holidays. It was worth the wait, and it is fucking fantastic. I think I’ve picked up the drums fairly well. I jumped straight into a hard career mode and I’m now half way through expert, having never played the drums in my life.

Anyway, Christmas was fun. It was probably the first year where I was looking forward to spending time with my friends and family, doing the usual stuff like eating fantastic food and getting fat more than I was looking forward to presents and shit. I’m getting to the age where I’d happily accept a pair of socks as a gift. Still, it was pretty good present wise. I got an iPod touch. I always though if I’d get an MP3 player it wouldn’t be an iPod because you’re buying a brand, not a top class MP3 player. Capability, quality and price wise they’re not the best. The iPod touch is a completely different market though. I bought it because it looks fantastic, does fantastic things and is so much more than an MP3 player. It’s the iPhone essentially, without the phone (I don’t need a phone – I have one without a ridiculous contract) but thinner and a lot cheaper. Almost everyone I know has fallen in love with it and wants one. Including my parents, who are scared of technology love it because it’s so simple. No buttons… just press what you want. And who isn’t impressed at zooming in on a picture by pinching the screen. I’ve also jailbroke it and installed some pretty cool applications such as a scrobbler, a SNES emulator, SCUMMVM so I can player Broken Sword and a few other cool games and such. The internet works perfectly on it, and it’s cool lying in bed watching YouTube videos. All in all, I’ve probably only spent about 30% of my time on it actually listening to music.

So Christmas was cool. New Years was pretty good. Couldn’t be arsed to go out so I had a few friends round. I’m sure you can imagine what happened; we got drunk. I’m sure Lauren or Dee has some photos I’ll try and get to put up here. I’m back at Uni now. Been playing a lot of Rock Band with my housemates in our band ‘Crab Enamel’. Not been up to much else. Hanging around, drinking a bit. Went out last night for ‘one or two pints’ which turned into 6 or 7. Now I’m listening to ‘In Rainbows’ as loud as I possibly can. Best album of 2007 bar none. I’m sure I had something else to say, but I can’t remember what. Oh well…


Rock Banned

4 12 2007

So, between my last post and this one you’d expect something miraculous to have happened. Nope… same old, same old. We haven’t really even went out much recently. Last Thursday was quite fun. To make up for the fact that I hadn’t been out in a while, I got a wee bit drunk. We ended up soaking the kitchen floor and skidding across it. Then sliding down the stairs. Let’s just say it wasn’t the hangover that hurt the following morning…

Aside from that, the one glimmer of light was Rock Band. Rock Band itself is worth hyping up and getting excited over, but when you live in a house with 3 other gamers all of whom love Guitar Hero and such… well, we really wanted it. Unfortunately the UK release date isn’t even announced yet, labelled only as ‘Q1 2008’. My guess is March or April but I wouldn’t be surprised if it got delayed due to hardware issues. Anyway, we all contributed money to import it, assuming it was region free as 90% of the 360 games I’ve bought are. If not, I had a plan to borrow my brothers modded 360 to play it.

So we paid and waited. I must have refreshed at least 10 times a day on the tracking page to watch it get closer to our house. Finally, 10 days later, it arrived. But there was no delivery. One phone call to the delivery depot later, “You have customs charges. You can come and pick the item up and pay them”. Off to the depot we went. Handed over the tracking number, “There is no such item here”. Bugger. Wrong depot. I was at Royal Mail and it was being handled by Parcel Force. After a silly journey based on Royal Mail man’s terrible directions to the other depot, we arrived. Paid the ridiculous customs charges (£38… over $80) and brought the game home.

It was like christmas day. We set it all up and put the game in one of our 4 360’s. “This game is not the correct region. Go to for more information.” Well, that’s a bit shit, I thought. Not to worry though, I have my brothers not so legal console. In goes the disk… “This game is not the correct region. Go to for more information.”

Our faces dropped. An hour or so of research later, we found out that not a single firmware flash or mod chip can bypass region locking. This thought hadn’t even entered our mind… I thought the main reason for modding your console was to play imports. Surely after 2 years, somebody had figured it out. Shit. Fuck. Bollocks. So, Rock Band sits set up in our sitting room. A statue of what could have been. Were we stupid for blindly importing? Probably. But the awesomeness of the game made us do it.

Now we’re left with 3 options. Wait until the UK release and buy the standalone disk (The hardware is region free and working… for now). This would destroy the point of importing, and create another agonising wait. We could re-sell it on eBay. That way we’d have to agonisingly wait, but we’d have our money back in the mean time. And thirdly import an American console.

Me being the silly bugger that I am, I’m looking for an import. The cheapest NTSC console I can find. I don’t need an HDD or Wires or pads. And I won’t be buying this just for Rock Band. I’ll use it as an import console, getting games cheaper and quicker. But I really can’t afford it…

But I shall!

For the gods of rock…


Ágætis byrjun

18 11 2007

Hello one and all. Probably just one. What have I been up to this week? Well, I wish I had a grand adventure to discuss, but I don’t. I haven’t really been out this week. I had a few drinks in the house a few days ago. Well, actually more than a few. But nothing exciting happened. I just played on Halo 3 with my housemates til the early hours. Some American redneck asked me what the bitches were like in England, to which I replied “Probably the same as the bitches over there” and he said “I heard they have multiple men” to which I replied “Not from my experience” and he said “You must just be ugly” to which I replied “I look like your dad”. Thinking about it now in a more sober state of mind, what he said didn’t even make sense. In my experience, women don’t have multiple men, thus anybody I’ve been with has been with me only. Surely not a concept which would make one think I’m ugly. Unless of course you’re an ignorant, American imbecile. Either way, I had the last laugh. I then went on to play the Antiques Roadshow theme down my microphone. A theme which greatly translates to being a soundtrack to a battle.

Went to Dee’s house yesterday. Everybody was drinking, but I was feeling a bit weak/dizzy and I got a headache so I, for once, stuck to water. Nothing to note happened. Watched a bit of ‘Children In Need’. I decided that if Ross Kemp had a brother, his name should be Ted. Ted Kemp. lol. Made a few songs today. Bit bored really. Especially for a Saturday. Oh well. I spontaneously bought Rock Band on eBay yesterday but I’m regretting it now because I don’t have £150 to waste, but I really don’t want to wait til the UK release date (Probably around Feb/March. Maybe later) but I rang Gav today and he said he might pay for half of it, which is fair as the whole house would be playing it a lot. Who takes it home is a different matter, but I might just fully buy it off him when the time comes. Either way, it’s going to be put to use in the student house for the next 2 years.

And that is that. The name of this blog post by the by is a Sigur Ros album I’m listening to. I want their new DVD. And the limited edition ‘The Beatles – Help’ DVD boxset. It’s rather good. It features a deleted scene with Wendy Richard (Pauline Fowler) who, according to IMDb, has a rather extensive ornamental frog collection.